Occasionally, I like to reflect on the lessons I’ve learned.

Lessons can come from an experience, a person, a situation or when things don’t go the way, I think they should. The latter being my least favorite. This time, my lessons came unexpectedly. This time it was from a dog. Not just any dog, but the only dog I’ve ever had — Bentley. Even more crazy, these lessons came over the last couple of years. I am about to turn 54, so it’s taken me awhile to truly “get” what having Bentley has taught me.

All dogs are special and the most special one is one’s own, of course. Bentley’s story is a good one to know to appreciate the lessons I am about to share.

It was 2020. It was an eventful year with the coronavirus pandemic, two sweaty moves of our entire household, our youngest child heading off to college and health symptoms common for someone my age. We were also building a house.

That seemed like enough until my aging mother was not able to live on her own. She was 90 years old and like many people that age, her health and mental capacity were in decline and she wasn’t happy about it.

We invited my mother to move from Ohio to live in Oregon with us. She accepted the invitation and two weeks after we moved into our new home, my brother brought her to our house. I wouldn’t have had it any other way, but I will admit it was not easy to see her aging right before my eyes nor was it a smooth transition to take on the responsibilities of being a caregiver.

We had long thought that when life slowed down a bit, we might get a dog. I found Bentley in 2020 and things were not exactly what we thought life slowing down would be like. Tired, blue and stressed, I was surfing the internet to take my mind away from the chaos for a while. Bentley’s face appeared with the name “Little Man,” which was what we called our 10-pound newborn son.

A few more clicks and I discovered Little Man was for sale in Mississippi. The next thing I know I was on the phone with Rena, the breeder, and thinking about how I was going to suggest to my husband that we not only get a dog but that I would go to Mississippi to get him.

My husband eventually agreed and supportively said that a few days away would be good for me. Little did we know how very beneficial it would be to bring Bentley into our lives at this challenging stage of mid-life.

Bentley has taught me some lessons I wish I had learned when I was younger.

Joy can come in unexpected ways, if I don’t let my attitude blind me from seeing it. It doesn’t matter what kind of day I’ve had. Bentley’s tail wags and he runs to the window when I get home. He is always happy to see me. His smile and underbite make me smile, no matter how I feel. His welcoming bark makes me laugh, even if my emotions had been all over the place.

Being playful is healthy. Bentley is always ready to play fetch or chase. He brings me a toy and nudges me to let me know when it’s time for fun. Even if only for a few minutes, there’s no doubt Bentley likes to play, and I feel a boost in my mood and my heart rate.

It’s OK when things don’t go as planned. Bentley doesn’t get irritated when the car won’t start and I’m running late. Bentley doesn’t become frustrated when a long line makes what was supposed to be a quick trip a dreadful inconvenience.

Stretching is good for the body. Bentley starts each day with a full body stretch, laying on his back, belly up. Although it only takes a few minutes, he makes it known if he feels rushed in the morning and there’s interference with his stretching routine.

It’s OK to take a break or even to take a nap. Bentley can curl up and relax whenever he wants almost wherever he wants. How I wish I could do that. He could be in the middle of rough housing with another dog, and he takes breaks, even if only to catch his breath. When rested, Bentley can get rowdy and wrestle with dogs more than triple his size.

People learn throughout their lives and these lessons might seem basic to some. However, I’ve lived my life thinking I knew these things, but not doing them. Saying and doing are two different things. When I do these things, I feel good, and I seem to be more productive and effective.

I wonder what else Bentley will teach me.