At least ‘Baghdad Bob’ gives us something to laugh about

Published 7:24 am Saturday, April 19, 2003

War is such a horrific event filled with great personal tragedy that it’s a wonder humor can be found amid the broken lives and destroyed buildings. But. But within every conflict comes some figure who becomes an icon of the war. One of those emerging from the Iraqi war is the Information Minister Mohammed al-Sahhaf, a.k.a. “Baghdad Bob.”

This is the guy who stood in front of the media as U.S. tanks and troops rolled through the streets and said, “They are not within 100 miles of Baghdad. They are not in any place. They hold no place in Iraq. This is an illusion – they are trying to sell to the others an illusion.”

Some unconfirmed reports claim that Baghdad Bob committed suicide as Baghdad fell. I’m guessing he, himself, told reporters that. Like most Americans, I hope this is not true. Imagine the career he could have on the comedy and talk show circuit.

If you, like me, have become a fan of Baghdad Bob, you can’t miss this Web site: IloveTheIraqiinformationminister.com. It has all of his best quotes from his press conferences such as:

“We will kill them all – most of them.”

“Their infidels are committing suicide by the hundreds on the gates of Baghdad. Be assured, Baghdad is safe, protected.”

Along with a list of his best quotes, the people behind the Web site have placed Baghdad Bob in some of history’s most famous battles and guessed what he might say. In Gettysburg he states that Pickett’s Charge was a great victory. In Normandy on D-Day he announces that there are no Americans in France. At Waterloo he brags of the great French victory over the British.

It’s not that Baghdad Bob broke every rule taught in public relations classes about never lying to the media, it’s that he did so with such gusto and zeal. A Hollywood script writer couldn’t conjure up the kooky quotes this guy cut loose with every day in front of millions of people.

The first clue that the Iraqi regime had left town was when Baghdad Bob didn’t show up for work. That’s the same day Saddam’s statue was toppled in downtown Baghdad.

Let’s hope that when Iraq is a more settled place that the information minister can emerge and take his rightful place on the world stage. After all, we need a few more laughs during this uncertain time. And that says nothing of the money he could make as head of PR for companies such as Enron and others.

Yes, Baghdad Bob furthered his career over the last month. If nothing else, his words will forever be remembered as the best of the best when we reflect on the absurdity of such situations.

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